“You deserve to be beautiful and you deserve to be told over and over and over again”
I’m in talks with an app developer about creating a new app that cuts out the bullshit. It will be called LOOK. Look at me having the best time ever with the best friends ever. Look how good looking I am while I’m doing it, effortlessly. Look at me being in all the right places at all the right times by accident. Look how happy I am. Look how loved I am. LOOK. It will save a lot time because there will be no need for the pretense that social media is about anything else other than LOOK. It’s about showing and glowing. LOOK. The faker the better. AI is encouraged if it eases the looking for the rest of us. If you’re not pretty create a pretty AI version of yourself and start showing and glowing. Sell stuff and create hope for us ugly rich consumers. No more pretense.
My favorite excuse to post pictures of your perfect body is this one.
“Someone at the gym called me fat” angry faced emoji, followed by a picture of yourself looking super slim and gorgeous without an inch of fat and a storm of comments saying ‘OMG you’re not fat!” and “If you’re fat then I’m a whale!” and “Hey beautiful, ignore the haters”.
Or
“I’m sure nobody cares, but I’ve been sober for 571 days” followed by a picture of a half naked you muscles busting out of your porcelain skin.
Or
“I’m going to kill the a*rshole that threw curry on my work shirt” below a picture of a very athletic you, knotty with muscles and a bright white teeth, scrunching a shirt in the camera, showing off your delicious Latissimus Dorsi muscles. Comments and likes flow like “Oh no what happened, hope you’re ok stud?” “Looking good hot stuff”. “I’ll wash your shirt for you and anything else you need Sir”.
Look, on LOOK you don’t need to set up faux controversy or sympathy to whip up the likes. Just show and glow. No more faux content when all your really want to say is LOOK, specifically AT ME.
No more obligation likes, sympathy likes, reciprocated likes, drunk likes, boredom likes…etc. Just good old fashion likes for likes sake. Pure likes, if you like.
No more ‘take me back’ pretense when you want to reshare your summer holiday pictures because you know how super sexy you looked on that beach, at sunset, arm in arm with all those super sexy people you call friends proving that you must be super sexy in real life because you have so many super sexy friends. Comments drooling from the post. “All the feels babe, wish we were there now” Take me back. On your back, more like it. Like Whores! LOOK is for you! A social media platform for Like Whores who are sick to death of creating faux content to excuse their narcissism. Be self-obsessed, go on. Love yourself. No, adore yourself. Ney, worship yourself. LOOK.
No more telling a million strangers that you’ve just lost your partner to cancer and launching a new profile pic at the same time. Sure you brush your hair when you go to a funeral but do you do your make-up while delivering the eulogy? On LOOK you just post your new profile pic with flawless skin, forget about distracting your followers with your grief. You want the likes for sake of the likes. Pure likes, if you like. And that’s ok. You want everyone to LOOK. And that’s ok. It’s LOOK, we want you looking your best without the rest. You deserve to be beautiful and you deserve to be told over and over and over again, like. If you’ve got it, flaunt it because we want it. LOOK.
Our online tutorials will make sure every picture you take looks amazing, if you’re not happy with it you won’t need to caption it with ‘might delete later’. We’ll delete it for you, automatically. And don’t worry about it if you don’t get the likes you were hoping for. We’ll thrown in 1000 likes for every show and glow without the pretense or as we like to call it, the boring bit that makes you look humble and normally quite shy. Don’t get distracted. We are LOOK. You love yourself. And so do we.