“Right now if I had to choose between my Italian lover Marco and Parmesan I’d choose Parmesan. He doesn’t mind. It’s Parmesan after all. Italian’s are rarely jealous if you choose food over them” I don’t do romance. Having said…

“I could smell his sweaty sideburns” I love sitting at a bar having a beer. It’s a very masculine thing to do. No one questions a man at a bar having a beer. Even if he stinks a bit. If…

“Often a fillet from Tesco can deliver this or any raggedy rotten slab of cow, just drown it in Hot English mustard. If only we could drown the weather in Hot English mustard” I smother my steak in Hot English mustard…

“I get the back table near the loos most evenings and talk with my writer friends about death” Janet’s Bar is a drinking hole slapped about with tat in the fading opulence of South Kensington. I love this place. I…